为什么不同人面对同样的境界时，会有截然不同的处理方式？关键就在于是否接纳。如果我们有接纳现实的能力，即使面对逆境，也能处之泰然，积极应对，而不会对内心造成任何痛苦烦恼。
How come people react so differently to the same situations? The answer lies in acceptance. Having the capacity to accept allows one to confront adversities with composure and address them in constructive ways, without succumbing to suffering or afflictions.
如何具备这一能力？首先要从内心正视“无常”。事实上，这才是世界的真相所在，就像春夏秋冬，花开花落。
How is this skill cultivated? It starts with confronting the reality of impermanence head-on, recognizing it as a fundamental truth of life, unavoidable like the changing seasons and the flowering and wilting of blooms.
而所谓的永恒，只是我们的幻想和期待，是和世界真相不符的。三法印中，就以“诸行无常”为首。这是佛法的核心教义，也是宇宙人生的发展规律，告诉我们：从内在身心到外在世界，一切都处在刹那刹那的变化中。也就是说，这种变化从不停息，哪怕任何一个极短的瞬间，都在不停地变化。
The illusion of permanence is just that – an illusion and an expectation – disconnected from the world’s reality. All conditioned things are impermanent, the first of the three Dharma seals, lies at the heart of Buddha’s teachings. It underscores a universal law that governs everything, from our bodies and minds to the external world. Change is incessant, occurring every moment without pause.
就像苹果，不是在某个特定时刻腐烂的，而是在它看似完好时就趋于败坏了。人生也是一样，从我们出生的那天起，没有一刻不在生灭变化中，没有一刻不在走向死亡。
An apple, for instance, doesn’t suddenly become rotten but starts decaying while it still appears whole. Similarly, life is a series of constant changes. From our birth, there is never a moment when we are not undergoing change or moving towards our ultimate conclusion.
变是正常的，不变只是相对的。中国古代《易经》所揭示的，也是关于变化的原理。如果我们真正认识无常，就能坦然接纳生活中的一切变化，因为它本来如此。那样的话，任何逆境都不会对我们造成伤害了。
Change is inherent and natural, whereas stability is merely a temporary state perceived in comparison. This concept also aligns with the principles of change outlined in the Book of Changes, an ancient Chinese text. By truly grasping the nature of impermanence, we can accept any alteration in our lives with serenity, acknowledging that change is the natural order of things. With this insight, adversities we face lose their power to inflict damage.
关于接纳，佛陀在《杂阿含经》中以“两支毒箭”为我们作了开示。第一支毒箭，是被箭射中时的身苦，也代表我们遭遇的各种逆境；第二支毒箭则是由此带来的心苦。当我们被第一支毒箭射中，痛苦已经发生时，要及时止损，避免继续被第二支毒箭射中。事实上，这是比之前更严重、更持久的伤害。
In the Samyuktagama, the Buddha teaches acceptance using the metaphor of “two poisoned arrows.” Being wounded by the first arrow symbolizes experiencing the physical pain of adversities, while the second arrow signifies the ensuing mental suffering. Once struck by the first arrow, it’s essential to mitigate further damage to avoid the impact of the second arrow, as it is often the second arrow that leads to deeper and more lasting pain.
比如有人打骂你，不过是一时的伤害，但你对此怀恨在心或念念不忘的话，就会长久地陷入负面情绪，持续几天、几个月甚至几十年。这才是真正可怕的。反之，如果你能接纳的话，伤害就到此为止，不会进一步发展。
Consider the momentary discomfort when you’re attacked or insulted by someone. Allowing this event to linger in your thoughts or letting bitterness grow can lead to prolonged negativity, lasting days, months, or years, which is truly alarming. In contrast, by accepting the incident, its emotional toll ceases to escalate.
但我们也要知道，接纳不等于认同，更不是纵容，所以事后可以根据对方的情况，以适合的方式进行教育。其目的也是为了帮助对方，而不是自己要论输赢，争对错。
Nevertheless, acceptance should not be confused with endorsing or condoning the act. Instead, we can approach the individual later, offering guidance tailored to their condition, with the intent to aid, not to argue over who is correct.
摘自《心灵创造幸福》
作者：济群法师
Excerpted from:
Happiness Comes from the Mind
By Master Jiqun
